Dear Future Stella,
For the past couple of days I have been doing this thing where I go find Current Stella and pick her up- mid activity. I don’t really say anything to her, I just grab her and scoop her up. I wrap her legs around my waste and drape her hands around my neck. I hold her so tight and begin to stroke her hair. She just gives into this; becoming limp and releasing a giant sigh of relaxation. She doesn’t say anything but she rests her head on my shoulder and we both stay like this for a good amount of time.
I do this because I’m pretty awkward but I truly adore her affection. I won’t be the mom that dotes on her or remembers to give her a kiss every single time I leave for work. I’m just not an affectionate person but that doesn’t mean I don’t love our bond.
Every time I initiate this interaction, she welcomes it gladly. Whether she is eating, building a Lego tower or blowing bubbles outside- she will drop anything to snuggle up to me. I find this so incredibly sweet. She will even accept affection during a tantrum.
Don’t get me wrong, she is a lunatic sometimes, but in general she is seriously so nice. She is nice to our dogs, to her friends, to strangers, and shockingly- to me.
Future Stella, I hope you are still nice. I hope that you continue to inspire me to be more affectionate. I hope that I inspire you to recognize other forms of affection.
People scare me all the time about how their sweet girls grow up to be raging bitch nightmare teenagers. You might fall into this catergory. Maybe you will tell me that you hate me one day. Maybe you will try and run away. Whatever disaster you try and bring into my life, I hope I remember how simple it is to give you a hug. I won’t pretend that it will solve all of our future issues, but it sure won’t hurt to try.
Future Stella, I love you. Current Stella, if I didn’t have to go to work this morning I could have stayed in that hug forever. You are getting so heavy but there really isn’t anything else on the planet that compares to the feel of your hug. You farted on me though, and that pretty much killed the moment.